2 BOYS FOR SALE:CHEAP!

Okay i just want to start by saying that this has been the week from H*%L.......I seriously have 2 kids for sale to the first bidder. On family blogs you always read all the really sweet things that happen in families and not really so much about the "real" stuff. I have to admit that I have been somewhat guilty of this myself however, I intend to repent of that falsehood. Families have rough spots they all have challenges and they are called children.

I do love them very much.......
Please, I beg, be patient while I vent.

Lets begin with the last post, Kevin died. Not news, it has been three years now and admittedly I am somewhat bummed and not quite myself this week or weeks, whatever, who is counting. However, this is not the ultimate problem. I feel like because I am the only voice that my sons hear I have become somewhat like the teacher on Peanuts. "wwaaah whwaaaa whaaaaah" In one ear and out the other. I am the only bad guy around here anymore, there is no good cop, there is no one to balance me and give them something else to listen too. No one to rescue me. I am alone. That sucks. (that in itself is a whole other conversation...)

So you might be thinking what could possibly be so bad. Here is a recap of this weeks events. (Keep in mind that I am already feeling depressed if you will and tired from work, thankfully? this all took place during my time off)
Nick had not been feeling well for a couple of days and then on Tuesday he was down with a full blown case of the flu. (Fever, chills, body aches, cough etc.) Bad enough in itself but he was also scheduled for oral surgery on Wed. The doctor said it would be okay to go ahead with it as long as he wasn't vomitting. SO on Wed Nick had oral surgery, 4 wisdom teeth and a 5th impacted tooth sitting in his jaw sideways which required a bone graft. FUN! He did great with the surgery and I kept him medicated (thank goodness for Lortab) for a few days. On Thursday Ty came home from school with the same flu like symptoms and was sick all weekend. Thankfully, I had my flu shot at work and came through it with flying colors, kinda. (both of them are doing much better now, still have coughs, but better and Nick has healed quickly)

You might still be thinking that this is all just normal mom stuff having sick kids can be stressful but alas there IS more.
I couldn't get to Tylers bed to check on him during the night for fear I would be swallowed up in the disaster called his room. I had to tie a rope on just to find my way back. (This after he spent many hours cleaning it just days before.) As if fear of ones life isnt enough to upset a mom, his room is a constant source of contention between us. He is sick, he cant do anything about it. Can i let it go, noooo of course not, so I bottle it up for later. AND THEN......Report cards came during all of this and lets just say that no matter how much kids try to convince you that a "F" stands for "Fantastic" it just isnt true. OH and a seminary report card showing two incompletes because someone thought that sluffing wouldnt effect seminary grades.....BRILLIANT I TELL YOU!

Our lesson this week in Sunday School covered 1Nephi 16-22 and it was my turn to teach. (One more thing to add to my stressful week) I mention this while venting about my life because of something that stood out to me. They were given the Liahona which not only acted as a compass but also had important teachings engraven on it. The catch, if they were not diligent and obedient it didnt work. In other words, the Lord withheld the blessing. (D&C 82:10 I, the Lord, am bound when ye do what I say; but when ye do not what I say, ye have no promise.)
This gave me some ideas. My sons are clearly not being diligent or obedient therefore I will be withdrawing certain privileges (blessings). I am not talking about a traditional grounding because let's face it who does that really punish, me! I dont need anymore thank you! After a good family counsel Sunday evening, one in which I could speak calmly and rationally and in which I begged and pleaded with them to understand that my job is to prepare them to be good missionaries, and husbands and fathers, ones that can provide for their families. Men who love, respect and cherish their wives and all the other important things life has in store for them. to understand that they are not acting grateful for all they have been given. They of course recommited to doing their very best, I hope and pray that it works this time, because I am ready to runaway......I have an idea for a little experiment, one that might help them see the light and stay committed to doing their best. I need to finish thinking it out, but I feel inspired. I will let you know how it goes.
I just want to end with saying again:
I LOVE THEM VERY MUCH! THEY ARE GREAT KIDS! I AM GRATEFUL FOR THEM AND THE CHALLENGE, most days anyway......
I know that things could be so much worse and that is why I am trying so hard to do the right thing. Any ideas would be very appreciated.....